“Did you finish the report?”

“Yes yes, almost done.”

“When can I expect it?”

“Soon.”

Two days later, the report still has not arrived.

The manager feels frustrated.
The employee feels pressured.
Neither of them feels heard.

This is not laziness.
This is not incompetence.
This is a classic case of missing assertive communication.

Across Indian workplaces, teams often avoid saying clear no, clear yes, or clear timelines. The result is confusion, rework, emotional stress, and falling productivity. Everyone stays polite, but nothing moves cleanly.

Let us unpack why this happens and what organisations can realistically do to fix it.

What assertive communication really means

Assertive communication is often misunderstood.

It is not aggression.
It is not confrontation.
It is not being blunt or rude.

Assertiveness simply means expressing thoughts, boundaries, and expectations clearly and respectfully, without fear and without guilt.

An assertive response sounds like
“I can complete this by Friday. If you need it earlier, I will need support on task X.”

A non-assertive response sounds like
“Yes yes, I will manage.”

The difference may sound small. The impact is massive.

Why Indian teams struggle with assertive communication

1. Cultural conditioning around authority

From childhood, many of us are taught that questioning seniors equals disrespect. This conditioning follows us into the workplace.

So, employees
Avoid clarifying unclear instructions
Avoid pushing back on unrealistic timelines
Avoid saying they are overloaded

Managers then assume silence means agreement.

It does not.
It means fear of consequences.

2. Politeness is mistaken for professionalism

In many Indian organisations, being agreeable is rewarded more than being clear.

People who say yes to everything are seen as team players.
People who ask hard questions are labelled difficult.

Over time, teams learn a dangerous lesson.
It is safer to be vague than to be honest.

3. Fear of being judged as incompetent

Many employees worry that saying
“I do not have bandwidth”
“I need more clarity”
“I disagree with this approach”

will make them look incapable.

So instead, they overcommit, underdeliver, and silently burn out.

4. Managers are not trained to invite assertiveness

Most managers in India are promoted for technical performance, not people communication skills.

They may unintentionally shut down assertiveness by
Interrupting
Reacting emotionally
Rewarding only obedience

Teams quickly learn what is safe and what is risky to say.

The cost of non-assertive communication

This problem does not stay at the conversation level. It spreads everywhere.

Missed deadlines
Repeated rework
Passive aggressive emails
Emotional distress
Manager frustration
Team disengagement

Most importantly, productivity drops not because people are not working, but because they are working without clarity.

How to fix assertive communication at work

This is not a one-day workshop problem.
It is a system and habit problem.

Here is what actually works.

1. Normalize clarity, not compliance

Leaders must explicitly say and demonstrate that clarity is valued more than blind agreement.

In meetings, managers should ask
“Does anyone see a risk here?”
“What might block this timeline?”
“What support do you need to deliver this?”

And then respond calmly when concerns are raised.

This one behaviour change alone transforms team safety.

2. Teach assertive language scripts

Most people want to be assertive but do not know how to phrase it.

Train teams with simple scripts such as
“I can take this up after I finish X. Which one should I prioritise?”
“I need more clarity on the expected output before starting.”
“I disagree with this approach because of these risks.”

Scripts reduce emotional load and increase confidence.

3. Redefine professionalism in your culture

Professionalism is not silence.
Professionalism is responsible communication.

Celebrate employees who
Raise risks early
Ask questions
Clarify scope
Protect timelines

Make these behaviours visible and rewarded.

4. Train managers to respond, not react

Assertiveness dies when managers react defensively.

Managers need coaching to
Pause before responding
Thank employees for honesty
Separate intent from emotion

When leaders stay calm, teams become brave.

5. Build assertiveness into processes

Do not leave it to personality.

Use
Clear task definitions
Written priorities
Visible workload boards
Structured one on one conversations

Systems support behaviour change better than motivation alone.

A real transformation story

One mid-sized IT services firm we worked with faced constant delays and silent resentment.

Employees never said no.
Managers assumed commitment.
Deadlines kept slipping.

They introduced
Assertive communication training for managers and teams
Clear language frameworks
Safe escalation norms

Within two months
Meetings became shorter
Email confusion reduced
Delivery predictability improved
Employee stress dropped visibly

People did not become louder.
They became clearer.

What organisations must remember

Assertive communication is not a soft skill.
It is a business skill.

Without it
Time is wasted
Trust erodes
Culture weakens

With it
Decisions improve
Productivity rises
Teams feel respected and heard

The strongest cultures are not the quietest ones.
They are the clearest ones.

How QICPL helps organisations fix this

At QICPL, we do not run generic communication workshops.

We work with organisations to
Diagnose communication breakdowns
Train assertive language at all levels
Coach managers to build psychological safety
Embed communication norms into daily workflows

Because communication does not fail due to lack of intent.
It fails due to lack of structure and skill.

If your teams are polite but ineffective, agreeable but overwhelmed, it may be time to address the real issue.

The post Why Indian Teams Struggle with Assertive Communication and How to Fix It appeared first on QICPL.

The meeting was scheduled for 10 am.

Three people joined from the office.
Two joined from home.
One joined late because of traffic.
Another kept saying, “Sorry, can you repeat that? My audio dropped.”

Halfway through, the office group started a side discussion.
The remote participants went silent.
Decisions were assumed.
Responsibilities were unclear.

After the meeting, everyone felt busy.
But no one felt aligned.

This scene is playing out daily across organisations that adopted hybrid work without redesigning how work actually happens.

Hybrid work was meant to give flexibility, balance, and better productivity.
Instead, many companies are seeing slower execution, more confusion, and weaker communication.

The problem is not hybrid work itself.
The problem is hybrid work without structure.

The illusion of flexibility

Hybrid work promised the best of both worlds.

Work from home when needed
Office collaboration when required
Freedom with accountability

But what many organisations implemented was:

Unclear attendance rules
Inconsistent availability
Uneven access to information
Different expectations for office and remote employees

Flexibility without clarity quickly becomes chaos.

Where productivity is really getting lost

1. No shared rhythm of work

In fully remote or fully in office setups, teams eventually find a rhythm.

Hybrid breaks that rhythm.

Some start early.
Some start late.
Some are available on chat.
Some respond hours later.

Without agreed working windows, collaboration slows down and tasks stretch unnecessarily.

2. Meetings no longer work for anyone

Hybrid meetings are exhausting.

Remote employees feel invisible.
Office employees dominate conversations unintentionally.
Discussions happen before and after meetings in corridors.

Decisions get made in fragments.

What suffers most is clarity.

3. Communication moves to assumptions

In hybrid setups, people assume others know things.

Someone in office says, “We discussed this yesterday.”
Remote employees hear about it later.
Context gets lost.

This leads to repeated explanations, duplicated work, and growing frustration.

4. Accountability becomes blurred

When teams are not physically together, ownership must be explicit.

But in many hybrid environments:

Tasks are discussed but not documented
Deadlines are mentioned but not tracked
Follow ups are assumed

People feel they are working hard, yet outcomes remain unclear.

5. Emotional disconnect increases quietly

Hybrid work reduces informal interactions.

No casual desk conversations
No quick clarifications
No emotional check ins

Over time, people feel disconnected, misunderstood, or excluded.

And when emotional connection drops, communication quality drops with it.

Why managers are struggling the most

Managers are caught in the middle.

They must:

Manage visibility without micromanaging
Trust output without seeing effort
Support remote employees emotionally
Coordinate office-based collaboration
Handle complaints from both sides

Most managers were never trained for this.

So, they rely on control or over communication, both of which increase stress.

The real issue: hybrid work exposed weak systems

Hybrid work did not create these problems.
It exposed existing ones.

Lack of clarity
Poor meeting discipline
Weak communication norms
Undefined roles
Low emotional intelligence

When people are together physically, these gaps are hidden.
In hybrid setups, they become obvious.

How organisations can fix hybrid work confusion

Hybrid work needs intentional design, not trial and error.

Here is what actually works.

1. Define clear hybrid work principles

Teams must know:

Who comes to office and when
Why those days matter
What decisions require physical presence
What work can be done remotely

Clarity reduces resentment and confusion.

2. Redesign meetings for hybrid reality

Hybrid meetings should follow simple rules:

Everyone joins from their own device
Remote participants are acknowledged first
Decisions are documented live
Actions are assigned clearly

Meetings should not favour location.
They should favour clarity.

3. Move information from memory to systems

In hybrid work, if it is not written, it does not exist.

Use shared tools for:

Decisions
Updates
Project status
Next steps

This removes dependence on who was present.

4. Train teams on clear communication

Hybrid communication needs discipline.

Short clear messages
Explicit deadlines
Documented expectations
No assumptions

Clarity becomes the new productivity multiplier.

5. Build emotional connection deliberately

Hybrid teams need structured human connection.

Regular check ins
Camera on moments when possible
Non work conversations
Recognition rituals

People work better when they feel seen, not just monitored.

A transformation story from the field

A consulting firm struggled with hybrid chaos.

Remote employees felt excluded.
Office employees felt overburdened.
Managers were frustrated.

They introduced:

Clear hybrid guidelines
Structured meetings
Documented workflows
Manager training on hybrid leadership
Emotional intelligence sessions for teams

Within two months:

Decision cycles shortened
Miscommunication reduced
Team trust improved
Productivity stabilised

Hybrid work stopped being a problem.
It became a system.

A 30 60 90 day roadmap to fix hybrid productivity

Days 1 to 30: Diagnose and stabilise

• Identify hybrid pain points
• Define availability windows
• Redesign meeting rules
• Document workflows

Days 31 to 60: Train and align

• Train managers on hybrid leadership
• Improve communication standards
• Introduce emotional check ins
• Set accountability systems

Days 61 to 90: Embed and scale

• Review hybrid effectiveness
• Adjust office days purposefully
• Recognise collaboration behaviours
• Continuously refine systems

Manager scripts that reduce confusion instantly

• “Let us document this so everyone has clarity.”
• “Who owns this and by when.”
• “Remote voices first, then office.”
• “If it is not written, it is not decided.”

Simple language. Strong alignment.

Final thought

Hybrid work is not failing.
Unstructured hybrid work is.

Productivity drops when systems rely on proximity.
Communication breaks when clarity is optional.

Hybrid work succeeds only when organisations redesign how work, communication, and leadership function in a distributed environment.

Those who invest in this shift will build resilient, future ready teams.

At QICPL, we help organisations make hybrid work actually work.

Our hybrid productivity, communication, and emotional intelligence programs help teams regain clarity, alignment, and trust in flexible work environments.

If hybrid confusion is slowing your teams down, let us help you redesign it the right way.

The post Hybrid Work Confusion: Why Productivity Is Dropping and Communication Is Breaking appeared first on QICPL.

8:45 AM, Mumbai.

Ankita walks into the office, coffee in hand, trying to look composed.
She spent half the night replaying a tense conversation with her manager.

Her colleague whispers, “Morning! Big day today?”
She smiles and says, “Yes, all good.”

But inside, her mind is already drowning.
By noon, she has checked the same email five times, started three tasks, and finished none.
By evening, she feels exhausted, guilty, and behind.

Her output drops but not because she lacks skill.
It is because she is carrying an emotional weight no one sees.

This story repeats thousands of times across Indian workplaces every day.

And yet, most companies still think the productivity problem is about skills, effort, or deadlines.
But the real problem is much quieter:

Emotional distress is silently draining focus, clarity, and performance — far more than people realise.

This article breaks down what emotional distress at work actually looks like, why it is increasing, and what teams can practically do this month to fix it.

What emotional distress really looks like (it is not always tears)

Most people imagine emotional distress as breakdowns or visible stress.
But in the workplace, it shows up in subtler ways like:

• Overthinking every small decision
• Avoiding conversations that matter
• Feeling stuck even when workload is manageable
• Constant self-doubt
• Procrastinating because the mind is overloaded
• Feeling numb or disconnected
• Taking things personally
• Becoming unusually irritable or withdrawn
• Struggling to start or finish tasks

These behaviours are often labelled as laziness or lack of ownership.

But the truth is simple:
When the mind is overloaded emotionally, productivity collapses.
Not because the person is incapable, but because their emotional bandwidth is already full.

Why emotional distress is rising especially in Indian corporate life

Several patterns make this problem uniquely severe in Indian workplaces:

1. No one wants to “look weak”

Employees hesitate to share emotional struggles.
Not because they don’t trust the company, but because they fear being judged as incompetent.

2. Overconnected culture

Teams stay connected through WhatsApp, Slack, and calls at all hours.
The brain never gets a full emotional reset.

3. High pressure to perform without fail

Even a small slip feels career threatening.
This creates silent internal pressure that builds up daily.

4. Limited emotional literacy

Most people were never taught how to recognise or manage emotions.
They only realise something is wrong when performance drops or burnout hits.

5. Managers lack training to handle emotional signals

Managers know how to ask about tasks.
But very few know how to notice emotional strain early.

The hidden cost: how emotional distress destroys productivity

Unmanaged emotional distress leads to:

• Lower focus
• More mistakes
• Decision fatigue
• Slower task completion
• Avoidance of difficult conversations
• Unclear communication
• Conflict escalation
• Last minute rushes
• Falling motivation

Think of productivity like a pipeline.
Every drop of emotional distress becomes a blockage.
Enough blockages, and the entire system slows down.

Many organisations think they have a skill problem or time problem.
But often, they have an emotional resilience problem.

A simple framework to diagnose emotional distress — the 4 signals

You can identify emotional distress early using these four signals:

1. Behavioural shift

Is someone quieter, distracted, reactive, or unusually tired?

2. Output inconsistency

Good days and bad days with no predictable rhythm.

3. Communication changes

Shorter messages, delayed responses, hesitations, irritability.

4. Energy drop

People complete tasks but look emotionally drained after.

These signs appear weeks before performance drops publicly.
Catching them early is the key.

Five practical fixes teams can implement this month

1) Create Emotional Check in Moments

Just 3 to 5 minutes at the start of a meeting to ask,
“How is everyone feeling today”
Not a therapy session
Not oversharing
Just awareness
This single habit increases empathy and psychological safety.

2) Train managers to listen without judgement

Most managers jump into solutions or say “it will be fine”.
But employees need:

• Space to speak
• Validation
• Simple next steps

Teach managers three behaviours:

1. Listen fully
2. Label what they heard
3. Ask one helpful question

This changes everything.

3) Reduce emotional overload by reducing ambiguity

Unclear tasks create emotional stress ten times larger than workload stress.
Fix this by defining:

• What needs to be delivered
• By when
• What good quality looks like
• Who approves it

Clarity is an emotional muscle saver.

4) Build micro recovery routines

Encourage people to take:

• Two five-minute pause breaks daily
• Short walks
• Screen free moments
• Breathing resets

These reduce emotional heat and restore mental energy.

5) Offer structured emotional intelligence training

Skill training increases output.
But emotional intelligence training increases the number of days people can bring their best selves to work.

We have seen teams transform within weeks when they learn:

• How to recognise emotions
• How to pause before reacting
• How to handle triggers
• How to communicate clearly under stress
• How to maintain emotional boundaries

A real transformation story

A global IT services client came to us with rising conflicts, missed deadlines, and high attrition.
None of these were technical issues.

People were emotionally exhausted.
They implemented:

• Weekly emotional check ins
• A simple clarity framework for tasks
• Manager EI training
• Micro recovery breaks

In eight weeks:

• Conflict decreased
• Turnaround time improved
• Clients reported better communication
• Team morale visibly lifted

The best part
People said, “I feel lighter at work.”

A 30 60 90-day roadmap to reduce emotional distress at work

Days 1 to 30: Awareness and quick wins

• Introduce emotional check ins
• Train managers in listening skills
• Add clarity frameworks to tasks
• Encourage two pause breaks daily

Days 31 to 60: Culture shaping

• Build emotional literacy through short learning sessions
• Redesign meeting overload
• Document expectation clarity for teams
• Start weekly reflection practices

Days 61 to 90: Embed and sustain

• Introduce simple emotional resilience metrics
• Create a safe channel for early distress signals
• Celebrate emotionally healthy behaviours
• Train teams on conflict prevention

Manager scripts you can use tomorrow

• “No need to rush. Tell me what is bothering you.”
• “What do you need right now to feel supported”
• “Let us define clarity so you don’t have to carry mental load.”
• “Take five minutes. Reset. Then we continue.”

Small sentences. Big emotional relief.

Quick checklist to share with your team

• Are you taking emotional pauses
• Are tasks clear
• Are you talking about difficult emotions before they escalate
• Are managers listening
• Are you recognising early signals in each other

Final thought — emotional health is not a personal issue

It is a workplace performance issue.

Teams do not break because of workload.
They break because of emotional overload.

Fixing this does not require huge budgets.
It requires awareness, culture shifts, and training that helps people understand themselves and each other better.

And that is exactly why emotional intelligence training is becoming essential for modern workplaces. It helps teams stay clear, calm, and collaborative even during high pressure phases, the true foundation of consistent productivity.

#QuantumGroup #EmotionalDistressAtWork #CorporateIndia #PeopleFirstLeadership #LeadershipDevelopment

The post Emotional Distress at Work: The Silent Productivity Killer No One Talks About appeared first on QICPL.

“We are busy the whole day but nothing moves.”
“We start tasks but somehow never finish on time.”
“We have meetings back-to-back and no time to do actual work.”

It is not a lack of talent. It is not a lack of effort.
It is a time management crisis silently eating away productivity in corporate India.

At QICPL, we see this pattern repeat across industries, from tech to telecom to BFSI to manufacturing. Teams work hard but are constantly behind. Deadlines slip. Stress builds. Managers feel they are firefighting every single day.

The real question is: Why does this keep happening even in high performing teams

Let us break it down with what actually happens inside offices.

1. The Daily Workflow Chaos: Everyone is Doing Everything at Once

Most teams are juggling multiple tasks at the same time.

Emails keep coming.
Calls keep interrupting.
A colleague walks in with a “quick question”.
A senior messages “Can you check this now”

By the time they return to their original task, they have forgotten half of what they were doing. They restart. They lose flow. They lose time.

Multitasking feels productive but kills productivity.

When 10 tasks move forward by two percent each day, nothing gets completed and the team keeps feeling behind.

2. Meetings Without Outcomes

India loves meetings.

Daily standups that do not stand up.
Review meetings that review everything except decisions.
Status meetings with no status.
Brainstorming sessions with no action.

Meetings are important.
But meetings without clarity only drain energy and time.

What goes wrong

No clear agenda
No time boundaries
No one knows who will do what
No documented outcome
No follow up

The result: more confusion, more work, more delays.

3. Priorities Change Every Hour

This is one of the biggest killers of productivity.

At 10 am the priority is Project A.
At 12 pm it becomes Project B.
At 2 pm the boss wants an urgent deck for tomorrow.
At 4 pm a customer escalates something else.

Teams spend more time shifting priorities than completing them.

When everything is urgent, nothing gets finished.

4. Task Completion Takes Longer Than It Should

This happens across all levels.

Reports that should take 30 minutes take three hours.
Emails that should take five minutes take twenty.
Simple decisions wait for approvals.
People start working only when the deadline becomes a threat.

The common pattern we see in trainings:

Tasks are half understood
Processes are unclear
Expectations are assumed, not communicated
Files, data and information are scattered
People do not know the definition of done

The time loss becomes huge over weeks and months.

5. Lack of System Thinking: Individuals Work, But the System Does Not

Everyone works hard individually.
But the system does not support them.

There are gaps in workflow.
Communication breakdowns.
Role overlaps.
No rhythm in execution.
No structure to the day.

People are trying their best but the system quietly blocks speed.

6. Stress Becomes the Default Mode of Working

Long hours.
Late evenings.
Weekend spillovers.

Not because work is too much.
But because work is unstructured.

Stress is not coming from workload.
Stress is coming from the lack of clarity.

When people are always catching up, they never feel in control.

7. Managers Also Struggle with Time Management

Managers are often the most overloaded.

They work, supervise, troubleshoot, coordinate, and firefight at the same time. They spend their entire day solving problems instead of preventing them. They carry the responsibility of the team but with no tools to streamline work.

When managers are stuck in operational overload, teams naturally fall behind.

So, What Is the Solution

Time management is not about working faster or harder.

It is about working with structure.

Here is what we teach in our time management training programs at QICPL across industries.

1. Learn the Flow of Focused Work

Create protected time blocks.
Remove distractions during priority tasks.
Teach teams how to enter deep work mode.
Build a rhythm of execution.

2. Build a Clear System of Prioritization

Everyone should know:

What is important
What is urgent
What can wait
What must not be touched without approval

Clarity reduces chaos.

3. Set Daily and Weekly Operating Rituals

A team without rituals falls into confusion.

We help teams set:

Daily kick-off structure
Weekly planning rhythm
Review cycles
Manager check in patterns

This is the backbone of fast execution.

4. Conduct Effective Meetings that Save Time

Every meeting should answer three questions:

What are we solving
Who will do what
By when will it be done

No clarity no meeting.

5. Establish the Definition of Done

One of the most powerful tools to stop rework and delays.

Teams must know:

How complete is complete
What is the quality benchmark
What format is expected
What approval is required

When clarity increases, speed increases.

6. Build Manager Capability

Managers learn:

How to assign work clearly
How to manage bandwidth
How to prevent last minute rush
How to set expectations
How to follow up without micromanaging

A strong manager creates a strong team.

7. Reduce Stress by Increasing Clarity

When teams know what to do and how to do it, stress automatically reduces.

People feel in control.
Work feels lighter.
Deadlines feel achievable.

Why Companies Choose QICPL for Time Management Training

Because our programs do not give theory.
We fix the real on ground problems.

We study how your team actually works, not how they are supposed to work.
We identify the hidden time leaks inside your daily operations.
We redesign the workflow structure.
We give practical tools that teams start using immediately.

And the results are visible within weeks.

Faster execution
Cleaner communication
Less stress
More ownership
Better discipline
Higher output
Better teamwork

This is why India’s top companies trust us for improving productivity.

Final Thought

If your team feels busy but behind every day, it is not their fault.
They do not need more hours.
They need more clarity, structure, and system.

And that is what effective time management really means.

Enrich Your Human Capital with Quantum

Want your team to work smarter, faster, and with less stress
Contact QICPL for Time Management and Productivity Training
We will help your teams transform the way they work in just a few sessions.

Contact Us

#TimeManagement #Productivity #CorporateIndia #QuantumTraining #QICPL #WorkSmarterNotHarder #LeadershipDevelopment #TeamPerformance #LNDIndia #TrainingAndDevelopment

The post Why Teams Work All Day but Still Lag Behind: The Time Management Crisis in Corporate India appeared first on QICPL.

Negotiation, often this term has been associated with commercial bargaining. However, negotiations happen at every step of our life. Be it the recent Brexit negotiations between EU and UK or a hostage situation in which one negotiates to gain the confidence of the abductor, the truth is, we are always negotiating at every step in our life.

Most executives delight in upcoming business negotiating sessions with about the same enthusiasm as they have about a root canal at their local dentist. The stakes are high. Negotiate too hard and the deal is lost. If you’re too timid then you will leave money on the table, which in today’s economy is nearly as bad as losing. Having been a strategic negotiator for a lot of years, I realize that successful negotiation is an art, rather than a science. It’s the foundation of a solid relationship where both parties shift to a Win-Win mode. It’s not transactional as it looks. Please refer to my video here in order to understand the context of my description about negotiation. https://youtu.be/7vyqPXDRRlM

The three most important concerns in any negotiation are, first, relationship, then risk, and lastly, value. These concerns are the actual decision criteria that underlie any business transaction leading forward into the future. My starting goal is always to seek a win-win outcome. A win-win outcome is usually possible, but there are those unusual cases where win-lose or walk/run away become the only practical outcome. It should only be the other party’s intransigence that necessitates the latter results.

First, however, in order to have a successful negotiation, there are three important mental bridges that must be crossed over before you enter the room to negotiate. These are:

1. Clarify the relationship – Simply put, what is the current real and perceived business and personal relationship and its true value to your organization’s future? All too often, we hold on to the past, not realizing that often we must be willing to let go of what we have in hand if we are to be free to reach out for something better. We must cautiously determine what could be lost in this negotiation but alternatively look for new doors which may open before us, given the new-found freedom we would gain without the existing relationship. As business leaders, we frequently continue to pursue existing relationships beyond their prime, simply because it is easier and more comfortable than striking out to develop a new relationship that better suits our organization’s future. Thus we must place a well-focused thought on value in continuing the relationship, and be mindful of the pending negotiations.
2. Clearly Structure the Outcome Desired by Both Parties – I often find that teams will start a negotiation with the drive to win or even win-win, but have never committed to paper beforehand precisely what that means. Oh yes, they have a general idea, i.e., to place the contract at the best price or cost. However, the teams have not defined what is the optimal combination of price/cost and all other terms that reflect both teams’ best long-term interests. What is that magic package that permits everyone involved to believe they have been dealt with fairly and therefore, the relationship blossoms? I like to begin by preparing a written scenario that outlines what each team should view as a “great deal.” This is the optimum “win-win”agreement.
3. Determine Your “Walk-Away” Point – This is sometimes the hardest, but usually the most important, pre-negotiation decision it is important to reach. It is not a decision to be considered later, in the heat of the negotiation. The walk-away point must be approached calmly and with the prior two points in mind, for we truly must understand what each team needs to make it a “great win-win” agreement. Then, if the other team becomes unreasonable and prevents a win-win from occurring, we must weigh the predetermined value we placed on the relationship as well as ask the question, “do we really have a mutual relationship or merely one party taking undue advantage of the other?”

Lots of us don’t negotiate even when we know we should. As a group, women are especially guilty.

Whether we realize it or not, we don’t negotiate because we’re afraid. I asked readers to describe the reason they don’t negotiate more often. Here’s what they said:

• I’m afraid of looking ridiculous.
• Too afraid to lose an opportunity.
• Because (I’m afraid) most of the times the other person becomes stubborn or defensive.
• I am afraid I am the less knowledgeable person in the situation at hand.
• I feel that I might come across as pushy, but more often it is because it is so stressful to do.
• Generally afraid of being shot down. Hard to take rejection.
• Set pricing too often (you don’t really walk into Home Depot and say I’d like to pay less for that paint). Might even get laughed at.
• I prefer to avoid the potential to offend/anger the other party involved. I know that I am personally capable of engaging in a controlled and respectful negotiation, but it’s difficult to predict how a stranger will react in the same situation.

See a trend? Whether they used the word “fear” or not, all of these are fears. We can categorize them into three categories:

• Fear of rejection. (Hearing “no”.)
• Fear of being judged. (Having the other person think you’re pushy, ridiculous, an idiot or that you don’t know what you’re doing.)
• Fear of losing the opportunity.

Only one of these fears is rational: losing the opportunity.

The others, however, are irrational fears. Nobody wants to hear “no”. We don’t want to hear “no” from somebody we ask on a date and we don’t want to hear “no” to a raise request form our boss. But hearing “no” isn’t the end of the world. Nor is having the other person think you’re pushy. As long as it doesn’t cost you the opportunity, these things might matter it our head, but not in reality.

With the answers to these three questions firmly in mind, we are prepared to start negotiating. I am not a believer in much of the posturing that some negotiators put great stock into, such as who opens first and how, etc.

Furthermore, if your counterpart has not arrived at this determination beforehand, you can gradually educate them to this conclusion through the bartering process. Knowledge is indeed power. Most importantly, you clearly know when you are approaching the point of no return or that point where you have already concluded in the quiet calm preceding the storm of collapsing negotiations, and when you will walk away. Thus, you have the opportunity to steer the negotiations away from falling unnecessarily into a lose-lose downward spiral where relationships deteriorate and from which it is virtually impossible for the parties to recover. The chart below provides a visual reminder for your negotiating strategy.

In negotiations, silence is golden. One of the biggest negotiating mistakes people make is not knowing when to shut up. As soon as we’ve asked for something, the little neurons in our brain responsible for fear go haywire. So we talk because we’re nervous. Not only does that show we’re nervous (and maybe weak), we may even offer concessions before the other person pushes back.

Sometimes the hardest thing to do is to simply be silent.

When I worked in sales and had to present a prospective customer with a price quote, I instinctively wanted to immediately begin explaining it. But that only made it look like I was trying to justify the price rather than letting the value of the product speak for itself.

I learned to give them the quote and be silent—often for several minutes! It’s not a comfortable situation, but it conveys confidence, both in yourself and the value you bring to the deal. Even slowing down when you talk and inserting small pauses can have an effect.

Negotiating is an art, and you can easily devote days, weeks, even years to its study. (Indeed, top dealmakers and attorneys spend years learning and perfecting their negotiating skills.) If you want to delve into negotiating skills beyond this post, I recommend Getting to Yes: Negotiating Agreement Without Giving In—perhaps the most popular accessible book on the subject. Getting To Yes teaches non-adversarial negotiating methods you can use in almost any situation to get more of what you want more often.

What about you? Have you struggled with negotiating but overcome your fears or reluctance to negotiate? How did you do it? And how did you benefit? Have you learned any negotiation techniques that have proven especially valuable? Let us know in a comment!

Get in touch with me :

pratiks@quantumtrainings.com

pratiks@qicpl.com

The post Have you Negotiated Out of Fear? appeared first on QICPL.

Chief mentor and founder,

Quantum Group.

As more organisations focus on return on investment, it has never been more important to create an effective development and learning strategy.

But what are the key pointers to developing a learning strategy where organisational, functional and an individual’s learning goals are aligned for the good of the organisation? What measures can you take to ensure successful implementation?

Herein lies the issue. Many organizations today undoubtedly see the benefits of L&D inside their organization, however, they overlook a critical component: the learning strategy. Having a learning strategy can mean the difference between training your employees and successfully training your employees.

A well thought out and developed learning strategy will help ensure the overall effectiveness of training programs, longevity of your training initiatives, as well as, help safeguard the transfer of learning between a training program and the employee. Below are a few steps organizations can take to help develop an effective learning strategy.

Training Needs Analysis

One of the most disregarded areas of L&D is needs analysis. Too often, organizations will offer random training programs without taking the time to learn what their needs truly are.

Haphazard trainings tend to be the result of using only subjective data or, even worse, guessing. Subjective data tends to be gathered through both formal and informal conversations with organization leaders and stakeholders. This type of data is based primarily on opinion, and by itself, rarely identifies the training needs of an organization. The danger comes when decisions as to which training programs to implement are based solely upon that subjective data.

Don’t get me wrong, subjective data is not a bad thing. Data through opinion and observation can be useful, it should simply never be used as a single source of information when determining training programs.

The main issue with this type of data is that leaders and stakeholders often have tunnel vision and see their specific area of business only. Furthermore, they tend to see what is directly in front of them and are often less aware of what is happening in the frontline. Occasionally, organization’s get lucky using only subjective data but more times than not, they miss the mark completely.

It’s important that we use a framework. My recommendation is based on the following:

Knowledge
Skills
Attitude
This in turn will have some intrinsic values such as ownership and the collective outcome is performance

To get a holistic view of an organization’s training needs, they must incorporate objective data using analytics tools such as:

Organizational Analysis
Work/Task Analysis
Performance Analysis
Content Analysis
Cost Benefit Analysis
Another useful analytics tool that many of today’s corporations currently have available is the annual employee satisfaction survey. This survey is a highly effective and cost-efficient way for organizations to gain valuable training needs data. By asking a few, well thought out, open-ended questions in an employee engagement survey, the door opens to a plethora of useful information.

The best, most effective learning strategies don’t come from using subjective data or objective data, alone. It comes from using a combination of this information to help paint a holistic picture of where the most critical training needs are and which ones to begin focusing on.

To see just how important L&D is from an employee perspective, we analysed employee survey data from 20 companies representing different industries, in different countries and of varying sizes. For 16 out of 20 of them – or 80% – training and development was a key driver of employee engagement.

But should we really be surprised? In the current working environment employees, and particularly high potential employees, want to progress quickly. They want to be invested in, to learn new skills, to develop themselves and to have a career path mapped out. And this is only set to become more important as our working lives lengthen going forward.

Furthermore, trends such as increased automation and other technology and workplace advances continue to have implications for job roles and skills needed. Quite naturally, employees and companies will need to keep up with such changes to remain competitive.

So, in order to hire and keep hold of the best people, you’ll need to get your L&D house in order. Here are a few areas you could choose to focus on.

1. Foster a learning culture

Top-performing organisations such as Silicon Valley tech giants Amazon and Facebook foster a continuous approach to learning. From the day new starters join, there’s a relentless focus on learning, self-improvement and development. Encouraging such an environment and mind-set not only improves skill levels, it also fosters greater creativity and innovation too.

Of course such investment in L&D doesn’t always come cheap. And there’s a risk that some employees will take the training on offer and decide to jump ship. Arguably though, the benefits outweigh the risks and then some.

2. Identify needs and enable self-led learning

There’s been a definite shift towards employees themselves taking greater ownership of their own development. The company’s priority should be to better enable them to do this by providing the required support, resources and tools.

Make it easy for employees to access tools online too so there are no barriers to development. This might include:

Training needs analysis or diagnostic tools
An always on’ online feedback system that allows employees to both give and request ad hoc feedback from colleagues in a current workstream
A more formal 180 or 360 degree feedback where they can complete a self-assessment and/or to ask for feedback from their manager and peers
Competency assessment – either technical or functional – to gauge aptitude against core competencies for a current or future role.

Participation in these kind of processes can offer invaluable insight into where an individual’s development priorities should lie, informing their personal development plan.

3. Create a career blueprint for employees

You can help to map out a plan or framework for employees. This should help them to understand how they can progress, and the kind of skills and behaviours they’ll need to develop to do so. When introducing this, it’s also good to offer online tutorials on how to use the framework for personal development planning.

4. Invest in creating your own coaches

Today’s line managers need many more strings to their bow. One thing that can be tremendously valuable is to train them (and others such as HR team members) as coaches. Coaches are highly sought-after in companies for good reason; coaching is an empowering form of leadership that helps employees to think for themselves. Coaching is particularly valuable if you are aiming to encourage self-led learning, as trained coaches will be essential to embedding learning and supporting development.

5. Offer learning choices

Where possible, offer employees different choices of how and when they learn. This is important both logistically, to ensure willing employees are able to fit in desired training around day-to-day work, and from a learning preference perspective too as we respond better to different formats.

The 70: 20: 10 learning and development model is commonly favoured and it’s certainly a useful proxy for most businesses. This model suggests that 70% of learning be ‘on the job’, 20% comes from interaction with others (informally) and 10% from formal training or workshops.

So, consider an L&D plan that incorporates a good mix of e-learning modules, video-based training, and workshops – perhaps in shorter ‘bite-size’ format. Modules should cover specialist and role-specific skills as well as transferrable ‘soft’ skills as well as technical and more specialist skills.

6. Encourage collaborative learning

Also consider how best to encourage informal knowledge sharing in a collaborative way among teams and individuals. This can be achieved through setting up intranet forums, social networks such as Yammer or through establishing working groups. You can even link online platforms to an e-learning hub.

But, whether done online or face to face, by routinely encouraging all those undertaking training to share their insights, experiences and feedback with peers, you can amplify the learning and share knowledge more widely.

The post Making Learning and Development Strategy Work for Your Company appeared first on QICPL.

Key Skills for Raising Emotional Intelligence

Article by:

 Dr. Pratik P. SURANA (ACTP,Ph.D., EQ I 2.0 Certified Assessor and Coach)

Chief Mentor and Founder, Quantum Group

When it comes to happiness and success in life, emotional intelligence (EQ) matters just as much as intellectual ability (IQ). Emotional intelligence helps you build stronger relationships, succeed at work, and achieve your career and personal goals. Learn more about why emotional intelligence is so important and how you can boost your own EQ by mastering a few key skills.

What is emotional intelligence?

Emotional intelligence (EQ) is the ability to identify, use, understand, and manage emotions in positive ways to relieve stress, communicate effectively, empathize with others, overcome challenges, and defuse conflict. Emotional intelligence impacts many different aspects of your daily life, such as the way you behave and the way you interact with others.

If you have high emotional intelligence you are able to recognize your own emotional state and the emotional states of others, and engage with people in a way that draws them to you. You can use this understanding of emotions to relate better to other people, form healthier relationships, achieve greater success at work, and lead a more fulfilling life.

Emotional intelligence consists of four attributes:

•    Self-awareness:

You recognize your own emotions and how they affect your thoughts and behaviour, know your strengths and weaknesses, and have self-confidence.

•    Self-management:

You’re able to control impulsive feelings and behaviours, manage your emotions in healthy ways, take initiative, follow through on commitments, and adapt to changing circumstances.

•    Social awareness:

You can understand the emotions, needs, and concerns of other people, pick up on emotional cues, feel comfortable socially, and recognize the power dynamics in a group or organization.

•    Relationship management:

You know how to develop and maintain good relationships, communicate clearly, inspire and influence others, work well in a team, and manage conflict.

Why is emotional intelligence (EQ) so important?

As we know, it’s not the smartest people that are the most successful or the most fulfilled in life. You probably know people who are academically brilliant and yet are socially inept and unsuccessful at work or in their personal relationships. Intellectual intelligence (IQ) isn’t enough on its own to be successful in life. Yes, your IQ can help you get into college, but it’s your EQ that will help you manage the stress and emotions when facing your final exams.

Emotional intelligence affects:

•    Your performance at work. Emotional intelligence can help you navigate the social complexities of the workplace, lead and motivate others, and excel in your career. In fact, when it comes to gauging job candidates, many companies now view emotional intelligence as being as important as technical ability and require EQ testing before hiring.

•    Your physical health. If you’re unable to manage your stress levels, it can lead to serious health problems. Uncontrolled stress can raise blood pressure, suppress the immune system, increase the risk of heart attack and stroke, contribute to infertility, and speed up the ageing process. The first step to improving emotional intelligence is to learn how to relieve stress.

•    Your mental health. Uncontrolled stress can also impact your mental health, making you vulnerable to anxiety and depression. If you are unable to understand and manage your emotions, you’ll also be open to mood swings, while an inability to form strong relationships can leave you feeling lonely and isolated.

•    Your relationships. By understanding your emotions and how to control them, you池e better able to express how you feel and understand how others are feeling. This allows you to communicate more effectively and forge stronger relationships, both at work and in your personal life.

How to raise your emotional intelligence

All information to the brain comes through our senses, and when this information is overwhelmingly stressful or emotional, instinct will take over and our ability to act will be limited to the flight, fight, or freeze response. Therefore, to have access to the wide range of choices and the ability to make good decisions, we need to be able to bring our emotions into balance at will.

Memory is also strongly linked to emotion. By learning to stay connected to the emotional part of your brain as well as the rational, you’ll not only expand your range of choices when it comes to responding to a new event, but you’ll also factor emotional memory into your decision-making process. This will help prevent you from continually repeating earlier mistakes.

To improve your emotional intelligence—and your decision-making abilities—you need to understand and manage your emotions. This is accomplished by developing key skills for controlling and managing overwhelming stress and becoming an effective communicator.

Developing emotional intelligence through a few key skills:

Emotional intelligence (EQ) is built by reducing stress, remaining focused, and staying connected to yourself and others. You can do this by learning key skills. The first two skills are essential for controlling and managing overwhelming stress and the last three skills greatly improve communication. Each skill builds on the lessons learned in practising the earlier skills and include:

•    The ability to quickly reduce stress in the moment in a variety of settings

•    The ability to recognize your emotions and keep them from overwhelming you

•    The ability to connect emotionally with others by using non-verbal communication

•    The ability to use humour and play to stay connected in challenging situations

•    The ability to resolve conflicts positively and with confidence

How to learn the key skills that build emotional intelligence

The key skills of emotional intelligence can be learned by anyone, at any time. There is a difference, however, between learning about emotional intelligence and applying that knowledge to your life. Just because you know you should do something doesn’t mean you will specially when you become overwhelmed by stress, which can hijack your best intentions.

In order to permanently change behaviour in ways that stand up under pressure, you need to learn how to overcome stress in the moment and stress in your relationships by remaining emotionally aware. This means that you can’t simply read about emotional intelligence in order to master it. You have to experience and practice the skills in your everyday life.

Emotional intelligence (EQ) skill 1: Rapidly reduce stress in the moment

High levels of stress can overwhelm the mind and body, getting in the way of your ability to accurately “read” a situation, hear what someone else is saying, be aware of your own feelings and needs, and communicate clearly.

Being able to quickly calm yourself down and relieve stress helps you stay balanced, focused, and in control—no matter what challenges you face or how stressful a situation becomes.

Stress busting: functioning well in the heat of the moment

Develop your stress-busting skills by working through the following three steps:

•    Realize when you’re stressed ・ The first step to reducing stress is recognizing what stress feels like. How does your body feel when you’re stressed? Are your muscles or stomach tight or sore? Are your hands clenched? Is your breath shallow? Being aware of your physical response to stress will help regulate tension when it occurs.

•    Identify your stress response ・ Everyone reacts differently to stress. If you tend to become angry or agitated under stress, you will respond best to stress-relieving activities that quiet you down. If you tend to become depressed or withdrawn, you will respond best to stress-relieving activities that are stimulating. If you tend to freeze speeding up in some ways while slowing down in others, you need stress-relieving activities that provide both comfort and stimulation.

•    Discover the stress-busting techniques that work for you ・ The best way to reduce stress quickly is by engaging one or more of your senses: sight, sound, smell, taste, and touch. Each person responds differently to sensory input, so you need to find things that are soothing and/or energizing to you. For example, if you池e a visual person you can relieve stress by surrounding yourself with uplifting images. If you respond more to sound, you may find a wind chime, a favourite piece of music, or the sound of a water fountain helps to quickly reduce your stress levels.

Emotional intelligence (EQ) skill 2: Beat relationship stress with emotional awareness

Being able to connect to your emotions—having a moment-to-moment awareness of your emotions and how they influence your thoughts and actions—is the key to understanding yourself and remaining calm and focused in tense situations with others.

Many people are disconnected from their emotions—especially strong core emotions such as anger, sadness, fear, and joy. This may be the result of negative childhood experiences that taught you to try to shut off your feelings. But although we can distort, deny, or numb our feelings, we can’t eliminate them. They’re still there, whether we’re aware of them or not. Unfortunately, without emotional awareness, we are unable to fully understand our own motivations and needs, or to communicate effectively with others. We are also at far greater risk for becoming overwhelmed in situations that appear threatening.

What kind of a relationship do you have with your emotions?

•    Do you experience feelings that flow, encountering one emotion after another as your experiences change from moment to moment?

•    Are your emotions accompanied by physical sensations that you experience in places like your stomach or chest?

•    Do you experience discrete feelings and emotions, such as anger, sadness, fear, joy, each of which is evident in subtle facial expressions?

•    Can you experience intense feelings that are strong enough to capture both your attention and that of others?

•    Do you pay attention to your emotions? Do they factor into your decision making?

If any of these experiences are unfamiliar, your emotions may be turned down or turned off. In order to be emotionally healthy and emotionally intelligent, you must reconnect to your core emotions, accept them, and become comfortable with them.

Developing emotional awareness

Emotional awareness can be learned at any time of life. If you haven’t learned how to manage stress, it’s important to do so first. When you can manage stress, you’ll feel more comfortable reconnecting to strong or unpleasant emotions and changing the way you experience and respond to your feelings.

You can develop your emotional awareness by learning the mindfulness meditation that helps you to get in touch with difficult emotions and manage uncomfortable feelings.

Emotional intelligence (EQ) skill 3: Non-verbal communication

Being a good communicator requires more than just verbal skills and the ability to manage stress. Often, what you say is less important than how you say it, or the other non-verbal signals you send out葉he gestures you make, the way you sit, how fast or how loud you talk, how close you stand, or how much eye contact you make. In order to hold the attention of others and build connection and trust, you need to be aware of, and in control of, this body language. You also need to be able to accurately read and respond to the non-verbal cues that other people send you.

These messages don’t stop when someone stops speaking. Even when you’re silent, you’re still communicating non-verbally Think about what you are transmitting as well, and if what you say matches what you feel. If you insist, “I’m fine,” while clenching your teeth and looking away, your body is clearly signalling the opposite. Your non-verbal messages can produce a sense of interest, trust, excitement, and desire for connection—or they can generate fear, confusion, distrust, and disinterest.

Tips for improving non-verbal communication

Successful non-verbal communication depends on your ability to manage stress, recognize your own emotions, and understand the signals you’re sending and receiving. When communicating:

•    Focus on the other person. If you are planning what you are going to say next, daydreaming, or thinking about something else, you are almost certain to miss non-verbal cues and other subtleties in the conversation.

•    Make eye contact. Eye contact can communicate interest, maintain the flow of a conversation, and help gauge the other person’s response.

•    Pay attention to non-verbal cues you池e sending and receiving, such as facial expression, tone of voice, posture and gestures, touch, and the timing and pace of the conversation.

Emotional intelligence (EQ) skill 4: Use humour and play to deal with challenges

Humour, laughter, and play are natural antidotes to life’s difficulties; they lighten your burdens and help you keep things in perspective. A good hearty laugh reduces stress, elevates mood, and brings your nervous system back into balance.

Playful communication broadens your emotional intelligence and helps you:

•    Take hardships in stride. By allowing you to view your frustrations and disappointments from new perspectives, laughter and play enable you to survive annoyances, hard times, and setbacks.

•    Smooth over differences. Using gentle humour often helps you say things that might be otherwise difficult to express without creating a flap.

•    Simultaneously relax and energize yourself. Playful communication relieves fatigue and relaxes your body, which allows you to recharge and accomplish more.

•    Become more creative. When you loosen up, you free yourself of rigid ways of thinking and being, allowing you to get creative and see things in new ways.

How to develop playful communication:

It’s never too late to develop and embrace your playful, humorous side.

•    Try setting aside regular, quality playtime. The more you joke, play, and laugh—the easier it becomes.

•    Find enjoyable activities that loosen you up and help you embrace your playful nature.

•    Practice by playing with animals, babies, young children, and outgoing people who appreciate playful banter.

Emotional intelligence (EQ) skill 5: Resolve conflict positively

Conflict and disagreements are inevitable in relationships. Two people can’t possibly have the same needs, opinions, and expectations at all times. However, that needn’t be a bad thing. Resolving conflict in healthy, constructive ways can strengthen trust between people. When conflict isn’t perceived as threatening or punishing, it fosters freedom, creativity, and safety in relationships.

The ability to manage conflicts in a positive, trust-building way is supported by the previous four skills. Once you know how to manage stress, stay emotionally present and aware, communicate non-verbally, and use humour and play, you’ll be better equipped to handle emotionally charged situations and catch and defuse many issues before they escalate.

Tips for resolving conflict in a trust-building way:

•    Stay focused in the present. When you are not holding on to old hurts and resentments, you can recognize the reality of a current situation and view it as a new opportunity for resolving old feelings about conflicts.

•    Choose your arguments. Arguments take time and energy, especially if you want to resolve them in a positive way. Consider what is worth arguing about and what is not.

•    Forgive. Other people’s hurtful behaviour is in the past. To resolve conflict, you need to give up the urge to punish or seek revenge.

•    End conflicts that can’t be resolved. It takes two people to keep an argument going. You can choose to disengage from a conflict, even if you still disagree.

For more, write to me on pratiks@quantumtrainings.com

The post Daily Life Situations and EQ Skills appeared first on QICPL.

Chief Mentor and Founder

Quantum Group

pratiks@qicpl.com

pratiks@quantumtrainings.com

Employees cowered. One assembler was in tears. Fear gripped workers on the floor of the hi-tech assembly plant when their boss went into the attack mode. Ugly words spewed out of their manager’s mouth as he publicly shouted out “you’re so incredibly stupid I’m going to scream.” This was followed by taunts of “imbecile,” “dust brain,” and “I’m stunned by your worthlessness.” Employees seemed to physically shrink at their spots on the assembly line as a deadly silence of 10 seconds was followed by another onslaught of abusive language from the bully boss.

A manager’s words can slay, belittle, diminish and demoralize. Some superiors take advantage of their power and authority by going into full combat and assault mode.

Arrogance is characterized by a pattern of behavior that demeans others in an attempt to prove competence and superiority. This behavior is correlated with lower intelligence scores and lower self-esteem when compared to managers who are not arrogant.

“Does your boss demonstrate different behaviors with subordinates and supervisors?” . He says a “yes” answer could mean trouble. It’s a warning that “yes” replies to these other questions raise red flags and signal arrogance.

Lack Of Emotional Intelligence

Emotional intelligence is the ability to identify and manage not only one’s own emotions but also to empathize with and manage others’ emotions.

Leaders with low emotional intelligence become their own worst enemies. When they are in a bad mood, frustrated or stressed, it creates tension in the office. While they may not become physically violent, their words and actions may destroy an otherwise safe atmosphere, undermining creativity, innovation and performance. Lack of emotional intelligence hits the bottom line annually to the tune of $400 billion in lost productivity.

Inability To Share Credit

A key component to good leadership is selflessness. A quote that’s been attributed to multiple people, including Ronald Reagan, says it best: “There is no limit to what a man can accomplish if he doesn’t care who gets the credit.” Managers who fail to recognize this and take all the credit for their employees’ hard work will find that they lose the trust of those team members

Here are some signs to recognise the behaviours

• Does your boss put his/her personal agenda ahead of the organization’s agenda?
• Does the boss discredit others’ ideas during meetings and often make them look bad?
• Does your boss reject constructive feedback?
• Does the boss exaggerate his/her superiority and make others feel inferior?

It has been described in a better manner here:

Effect on morale

Left unchecked, arrogant leaders can be a destructive force within an organization, notes Silverman. With power over their employees’ work assignments, promotion opportunities and performance reviews, arrogant bosses put subordinates in a helpless position. They do not mentor junior colleagues nor do they motivate a team to benefit the organization as a whole, contributing to a negative social workplace atmosphere.

Silverman says that arrogance is less a personality trait than a series of behaviors, which can be addressed through coaching if the arrogant boss is willing to change. He recommends that organizations incorporate an assessment of arrogance into the employee review and performance management process.

Silverman emphasizes that cultivating humility among leaders and promoting a learning-oriented work climate go far in reducing arrogance and increasing productive leadership and employee social interaction.

How to identify this? Is there a measurement:

Scientists have developed a new tool which they claim can help organisations to identify arrogant bosses before they have a costly and damaging impact on the company.

According to researchers, arrogant bosses can drain the bottom line because they are typically poor performers who cover up their insecurities by disparaging subordinates, leading to organisational dysfunction and employee turnover

A new measure of arrogance, called ‘The Workplace Arrogance Scale’ (WARS) has been developed by researchers at The University of Akron and Michigan.

“Does your boss demonstrate different behaviors with subordinates and supervisors” asks Stanley Silverman, dean of UA’s Summit University Colleges.

He says a “yes” answer could mean trouble.

Silverman warns that “yes” replies to these other questions raise red flags and signal arrogance.

“Does your boss put his/her personal agenda ahead of the organisation’s agenda Does the boss discredit others’ ideas during meetings and often make them look bad Does your boss reject constructive feedback Does the boss exaggerate his/her superiority and make others feel inferior” Silverman asked.

The Workplace Arrogance Scale (WARS) will be presented at the American Psychological Association convention in Orlando on August 2.

Arrogance is characterised by a pattern of behaviour that demeans others in an attempt to prove competence and superiority.

Silverman says this behaviour is correlated with lower intelligence scores and lower self-esteem when compared to managers who are not arrogant.

Left unchecked, arrogant leaders can be a destructive force within an organisation, notes Silverman. With power over their employees’ work assignments, promotion opportunities and performance reviews, arrogant bosses put subordinates in a helpless position.

They do not mentor junior colleagues nor do they motivate a team to benefit the organization as a whole, contributing to a negative social workplace atmosphere.

Silverman says that arrogance is less a personality trait than a series of behaviors, which can be addressed through coaching if the arrogant boss is willing to change.

So what should be the ideal behaviour:

Here are 10 things true leaders do:

1. They listen to their team members.

2. They coach employees rather than threatening them with a poor performance review or dismissal.

3. They trust their employees to do their jobs without close supervision.

4. They are open to and grateful for new ideas.

5. They encourage their teammates.

6. They bring important issues to senior leadership to be dealt with. They are not afraid to broach sticky or politically-sensitive topics — or maybe they are afraid, but they do it anyway.

7. They thank and acknowledge their team members.

8. They inspire people to do great things.

9. They hire people who are skilled in areas they’re not skilled in.

10. They lead through trust, rather than fear.

Unfortunately, there are plenty of managers around who manage in just the opposite way.

They manage through fear.

Who else do we know that uses fear to get their way? Bullies do it! Most of us have been dealing with bullies since we were little kids.

We can recognize a fearful, weak manager when we run into one because they remind us of schoolyard bullies we knew years ago.

A true leader doesn’t bully anyone. They don’t need to, and they wouldn’t dream of it. It would beneath them to threaten or harangue their employees.

Fake leaders bully people all the time. They don’t have the muscles to manage any other way. They are weak.

It doesn’t take strength to yell at people, write them up or blame them for mistakes.

It doesn’t take courage to boss people around when the organizational chart gives you the power to do that. It is the height of cowardice to manage a team with the presumption that they have to listen to you, because of your job title relative to theirs.

That isn’t leadership! That is letting your job title do the job for you.

Managers who bluster and threaten people are weak.

Maybe your weak manager will experience a powerful life event that will turn their head around, but I wouldn’t recommend that you hold your breath waiting for that to happen.

Your best bet is to launch a job search and get out from under a weak manager.

Your flame will never grow as high as it can grow when you work under someone whose greatest fear is that one day, you will find your voice.

WARS Source:

Materials provided by University of Akron. Note: Content may be edited for style and length.

For more:

Reach me at pratiks@quantumtrainings.com

The post Arrogant Managers and Their Counter Productive Behaviours!! appeared first on QICPL.

Chief Mentor and Founder,Quantum Group

pratiks@quantumtrainings.com

pratiks@qicpl.com

http://www.youtube.com/pratik0510

Some of the greatest moments in human history were fuelled by emotional intelligence. When Martin Luther King, Jr. presented his dream, he chose language that would stir the hearts of his audience. instead of honouring this sacred obligation・

Delivering this electrifying message required emotional intelligence the ability to recognize, understand, and manage emotions. Dr. King demonstrated remarkable skill in managing his own emotions and in sparking emotions that moved his audience to action. As his speech writer Clarence Jones reflected, King delivered perfectly balanced outcry of reason and emotion, of anger and hope. His tone of pained indignation matched that note for note.”

Emotional intelligence is important, but the unbridled enthusiasm has obscured a dark side.

Recognizing the power of emotions, another one of the most influential leaders of the 20th century spent years studying the emotional effects of his body language. Practising his hand gestures and analysing images of his movements allowed him to become an absolutely spellbinding public speaker says the historian Roger Moorhouse it was something he worked very hard on. His name was Adolf Hitler.

Since the 1995 publication of Daniel Goleman  best-seller, emotional intelligence has been touted by leaders, policy-makers, and educators as the solution to a wide range of social problems. If we can teach our children to manage emotions, the argument goes, we have less bullying and more cooperation. If we can cultivate emotional intelligence among leaders and doctors, we have more caring workplaces and more compassionate healthcare. As a result, emotional intelligence is now taught widely in secondary schools, business schools, and medical schools.

Emotional intelligence is important, but the unbridled enthusiasm has obscured a dark side. New evidence shows that when people hone their emotional skills, they become better at manipulating others. When you’re good at controlling your own emotions, you can disguise your true feelings. When you know what others are feeling, you can tug at their heartstrings and motivate them to act against their own best interests.

Social scientists have begun to document this dark side of emotional intelligence. In emerging research led by University of Cambridge professor Jochen Menges, when a leader gave an inspiring speech filled with emotion, the audience was less likely to scrutinize the message and remembered less of the content. Ironically, audience members were so moved by the speech that they claimed to recall more of it.

Facebook caught a lot of flak over the experiment, primarily because none of the “participants” gave their consent to join the study. Perhaps more frightening than Facebook’s faux pas was just how easily people’s emotions were manipulated. After all, if Facebook can manipulate your emotions just by tweaking your newsfeed, imagine how much easier this is for a real, live person who knows your weaknesses and triggers. A skilled emotional manipulator can destroy your self-esteem and even make you question your sanity

It’s precisely because emotional manipulation can be so destructive that it’s important for you to recognize it in your own life. It’s not as easy as you might think, because emotional manipulators are typically very skillful. They start out with subtle manipulation and raise the stakes over time, so slowly that you don’t even realize it’s happening. Fortunately, emotional manipulators are easy enough to spot if you know what to look for.There is no question that EQ is a desirable and highly adaptive trait, and it is understandable that we generally prefer EQ to be high rather than low. However, obsessing over high EQ will create a workforce of emotionally stable, happy, and diplomatic people who potter along and follow rules enthusiastically instead of driving change and innovation. They will be great followers and good managers, but don’t expect them to be visionary leaders or change agents.

1. They undermine your faith in your grasp of reality. Emotional manipulators are incredibly skilled liars. They insist an incident didn’t happen when it did, and they insist they did or said something when they didn’t. The trouble is they’re so good at it that you end up questioning your own sanity. To insist that whatever caused the problem is a figment of your imagination is an extremely powerful way of getting out of trouble.

2. Their actions don’t match their words. Emotional manipulators will tell you what you want to hear, but their actions are another story. They pledge their support, but, when it comes time to follow through, they act as though your requests are entirely unreasonable. They tell you how lucky they are to know you, and then act as though you’re a burden. This is just another way of undermining your belief in your own sanity. They make you question reality as you see it and mold your perception according to what is convenient to them.

3. They are experts at doling out guilt. Emotional manipulators are masters at leveraging your guilt to their advantage. If you bring up something that’s bothering you, they make you feel guilty for mentioning it. If you don’t, they make you feel guilty for keeping it to yourself and stewing on it. When you’re dealing with emotional manipulators, whatever you do is wrong, and, no matter what problems the two of you are having, they’re your fault.

4. They claim the role of the victim. When it comes to emotional manipulators, nothing is ever their fault. No matter what they do—or fail to do —it’s someone else’s fault. Someone else made them do it—and, usually, it’s you. If you get mad or upset, it’s your fault for having unreasonable expectations; if they get mad, it’s your fault for upsetting them. Emotional manipulators don’t take accountability for anything.

5. They are too much, too soon. Whether it’s a personal relationship or a business relationship, emotional manipulators always seem to skip a few steps. They share too much too soon—and expect the same from you. They portray vulnerability and sensitivity, but it’s a ruse. The charade is intended to make you feel “special” for being let into their inner circle, but it’s also intended to make you feel not just sorry for them but also responsible for their feelings.

6. They are an emotional black hole. Whatever emotional manipulators are feeling, they’re geniuses at sucking everyone around them into those emotions. If they’re in a bad mood, everyone around them knows it. But that’s not the worst part: they’re so skillful that, not only is everyone aware of their mood, they feel it too. This creates a tendency for people to feel responsible for the manipulator’s moods and obliged to fix them.

7. They eagerly agree to help—and maybe even volunteer—then act like a martyr. An initial eagerness to help swiftly morphs into sighs, groans, and suggestions that whatever they agreed to do is a huge burden. And, if you shine a spotlight on that reluctance, they’ll turn it around on you, assuring you that, of course, they want to help and that you’re just being paranoid. The goal? To make you feel guilty, indebted, and maybe even crazy.

8. They always one-up you. No matter what problems you may have, emotional manipulators have it worse. They undermine the legitimacy of your complaints by reminding you that their problems are more serious. The message? You have no reason to complain, so shut the heck up.

9. They know all your buttons and don’t hesitate to push them. Emotional manipulators know your weak spots, and they’re quick to use that knowledge against you. If you’re insecure about your weight, they comment on what you eat or the way your clothes fit; if you’re worried about an upcoming presentation, they point out how intimidating and judgmental the attendees are. Their awareness of your emotions is off the charts, but they use it to manipulate you, not to make you feel better.

The summing up is :

Overcoming Manipulation

Emotional manipulators drive you crazy because their behavior is so irrational. Make no mistake about it—their behavior truly goes against reason, so why do you allow yourself to respond to them emotionally and get sucked into the mix?

The more irrational and off-base someone is, the easier it should be for you to remove yourself from their traps. Quit trying to beat them at their own game. Distance yourself from them emotionally, and approach your interactions with them like they’re a science project (or you’re their shrink if you prefer that analogy). You don’t need to respond to the emotional chaos—only the facts.

We need to be aware of leaders who have self-serving motives, and use emotional intelligence as a weapon for manipulating others. Such leaders intentionally shape their emotions to fabricate favorable impressions of themselves.

So, due to the growing recognition that emotional intelligence — like any other skill — can be used for good or evil in leadership, it is critical to consider the values that go along with it and where it’s actually useful. This should be incorporated in leadership training. One should hold it in mind and heart as they sharpen their own leadership skills.

To know more: please write back to me..

pratiks@quantumtrainings.com

The post Manipulators who Misuse Emotional Intelligence and EQ the Darker Side appeared first on QICPL.

Chief Mentor and Founder

Quantum Group

pratiks@quantumtrainings.com

pratiks@qicpl.com

Bad managers come in many shapes and forms, and the worst of them might even combine several annoying tactics to control their employees. Thankfully, the Head Honchos sometimes see through the smoke screen eventually.

These days it may be hard to decipher who’s into playing mind games and who isn’t. When it comes to playing mind games, a man or a woman could take the cake. You never really know who’s playing games, unless you see the signs. People that are into mind games are generally also the player types, but not always. Player types are generally out for themselves, deceiving, misleading, and usually have ulterior motives than what they say. I’ve written about the player type before, but not necessarily about mind games. In this article, I’m hoping to stress the importance of what mind games are, how they can hurt people, the reason that people play them, and whether or not most people actually enjoy them.

One of the managers I used to work for, “Jim,” was a challenge for a variety of reasons.

Jim relished keeping his employees on edge and robbing them of any sense of personal control. He didn’t like when tasks weren’t done his way, even if the solution was better than what he had designed. He never played fairly and always hoarded a few main details to keep employees in the dark.

There are a number of reasons people play mind games, but the goal is usually to gain a sense of control or power over another person. The player wants to get a specific response, but instead of telling you what they need or asking for what they want, they try to get their needs met by using manipulative tactics. It’s all about feeling powerful and in control, but those feelings never last for very long. Any time we try to use someone else to make ourselves feel better, it usually doesn’t end well. It’s almost impossible to create an authentic connection with someone when honest communication is missing from the picture.

I don’t know about you, and your personality type, but I don’t stick around for people to play games with my mind, and wind up feeling hurt, less than, or insecure by any means. I’m the type that likes a lot of attention in a relationship, and when I don’t get enough attention, it’s usually either because someone is really busy, and a driven, motivated, hard-working type, or it’s because they’re playing games. When I find out that someone is more of the game-playing type, I peace out immediately. I’d recommend that you do the same if you’re in a similar type of situation. No one should put up with mind games, and once you’ve let the person know that you’re not into playing games, and they still choose to play them, you should leave, and end the situation.

Another way that people play mind games is by pretending to be someone or something that they’re not. When someone doesn’t act like their true self, it’s not only a waste of time for both people, but a person may end up leaving that situation because they didn’t like the version of yourself that you showed them, and they might’ve actually liked the real you. Many times people have been hurt before, go into new situations before they’re ready, or possibly even when they’re feeling less confident, and it’s important to recognize that you’re feeling that way, and stop it immediately!

Remember, confidence is sexy, and arrogance is ugly. There’s a very thin line between someone that shows that they’re a confident person, by being themselves, and by being proud of themselves for how they look, what they’re doing in their life, and how much they’ve achieved so far. As opposed to someone that’s arrogant, trying to prove that they’re better than anyone else, that they’ve achieved more than anyone else, and that anyone that’s with them needs to be nearly perfect. Who the heck wants to be with someone perfect anyway! There’s nothing fun, and sexy about someone who’s perfect in my humble opinion.

How to Deal With Mind Games

The best way to deal with mind games is simply to rise above them. You should avoid trying to ‘beat them at their own game’, as doing so can actually end up with both of you getting hurt. Normally the mind games being employed are used for the simple reason that the person doing it is too afraid to confront you directly, or they know you would win the confrontation. They are using indirect and manipulative techniques, because they feel insecure, or because you are in the stronger position. Thus if you call them directly on what you suspect, and if you address the issue publicly, they will more often than not reverse course and back down and you will win.

So for instance if someone were to try and subtly undermine you in a workplace, you could try to do the same back and would end up with both of your reputations tarnished (and the fact that you were stopping to underhand methods would be a mark against you too). However if you simply told them you didn’t like what they were implying and that they should address you directly through the proper channels if they have a complaint, then you’ll find they often apologise and back down and that you end up with the better reputation.

Likewise in relationships this can work well too – simply ask directly what it is that is bothering your partner, and if there is anything you can do to help. This demonstrates sensitivity, but also means you aren’t engaging in mind games that will likely end up getting you both hurt. If they aren’t in a talking mood then the best thing to do is simply remove yourself from the situation – tell them that you have no interest in mind games and that you will talk to them when they want to speak openly and maturely.

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